life choices

Increase Your Gym Attendance With These 4 Simple Steps

Image courtesy of Upsplash

Image courtesy of Upsplash

A simple fact is that getting out to do something like going to the gym can often help us feel a bit better. But we’re in a catch 22 here. How do we get to the gym if we don’t have the motivation to do it!?

Many people often hold the common misconception that they need motivation in order to actually do something. The truth is, it is often the opposite - we have to do something in order to get the engines moving to spark motivation. So we are offered two choices here; force the initiative to get started to reap the motivation later, or increase motivation from the get-go. Both work wonders to improve your likelihood of success.

Let’s adopt some Motivational Interviewing* and Behavioural Psychology principles here that you can apply to increase your likelihood of making it to the gym. Why is this important to me as a psychologist? Well, because if your body is healthier, it’s much easier for your mind to work well too.


What's Your Why

Simon Sinek wrote a wonderful book called ‘Find Your Why’ a few years back promoting the importance of meaning and purpose in sustaining fulfillment in our lives. Sinek talks about our WHY being grounded in the biology of human decision making and we can take advantage of this in increasing our motivation towards something even as simple as the gym.

The questions to ask yourself here and be honest with your answers are “Why are you really going to the gym? Do you have a goal?”

Go on. Think now for a minute beyond your immediate answer. What else? What are some good things about exercising for you? What are some of the not so good things about not exercising for you? How important are these things really to you? Be honest.

Your answers here can help highlight your motivations for the gym - whether they are intrinsic (self oriented) or extrinsic (other oriented), for example. There are no right or wrong responses in any of your responses, though your likelihood of exercising is significantly increased if you can brainstorm more intrinsic motivations for attending the gym like you value your health, rather than extrinsic such as going because your partner/ your doctor/ society believes you should. This is YOUR why we are looking for here, not someone else’s.

From your reflections, form a concise and comprehensive WHY for you exercising. Try reminding yourself of this statement whenever your motivation dips. Sinek tells us to return to this statement regularly and ensure your every action is aligned with it.


Behavioural Activation & Removing Choices For Your Lazy Brain

I regularly meet people who say that they lack motivation and I challenge this statement outright. The statement is categorically untrue even in the depths of disorders such as depression. What these people really mean is that they lack motivation to do the things that they feel they should be doing or want to be doing. Even in doing nothing we are motivated to be doing nothing right? From the very core of our evolution, motivation is inescapable.

One commonly used initial approach to supporting people facing depression is called Behavioural Activation (check it out if your interested). It’s basic, but it works. It involves getting started at the lowest common point of action and building from there. The same can be applied to the gym. Say you’ve lapsed for a while in your attendance. Start off small. Aim to walk around the block today. Awesome. That’s it, you're done... Tomorrow 2 blocks. 3 a few days after. Be kind to yourself and you will be rewarded with motivation to continue through the achievement of mini-successes.

An alternative approach to maximising the chance of your success, is to try minimising the barriers to your activity...

Take going to a 6:30 class in the morning for example. What steps are you taking to ensure that you get there? Early night and alarm set? Great, this is the bare minimum. Now let’s make it easier for your brain in the morning by reducing choices. How about getting your entire gym outfit including socks and shoes ready by the bed the night before? Or take this one step further and wear your (clean) gym clothes to bed the night before?

Ensuring you have fuel in the car the day before. Check.

Getting your water bottle filled. Check.

Breakfast partially made. Check.

Protein shaker prepared by the door in a bag. Check.

Camping outside the gym ? Okay, too far….

Get this stuff done while you’ve time because at first light, most people’s brains are often more motivated towards sleep than a jog and so will create any mental excuse to avoid extra activity.


Schedule in Your Non-Negotiables

Facilitating change in your life is not always easy and so let us take out another choice for your brain - deciding when.

'When' refers to scheduling your weekly exercise routine. Everyone has different exercise requirements according to their goals. This is fine. You are more likely to keep to your goal if you have gym times scheduled in to your week as non-negotiables though. ‘Non-negotiables’ are like if your boss said, “This has to be on my desk by the morning or you’re fired” (Does that only happen in movies? I don’t know). Either way, it’s NON-NEGOTIABLE.

What’s that? Beer offer at work lunch - gym time is still non-negotiable.

Stayed up late to watch final 3 episodes of GOT on TV - still non-negotiable.

Essay due at end of week - definitely non-negotiable…

As before, set your gym attendance goals realistically and be kind to yourself and you will achieve what you set out to. This will encourage you to be more motivated to continue. Setting out a new gym membership thinking you’re going to go 6 times a week every week from day one is likely to lead to failure. This will lead to demotivation to attend.


Train with a Mate

Your brain was evolutionarily designed towards adapting itself to the easiest possible solution to every problem it faces. Simple solution: get another brain on board to hold your brain accountable.

According to the research, you are more likely to remain committed to a weight loss program or gym regime if you have a gym buddy. Also, the Kohler Effect describes that no-one wants to be the weakest link. So..., in a gym setting, you will generally push yourself harder if you hang around with people just above your own fitness/ strength level.

Finally, mix it up with the people you exercise with. Go to different time classes, join a community sports team, go running with your gym buddy... By making your workout schedule fresh, this will increase your brain’s intrinsic desire for stimulation and improve your motivation.


I hope this finds you well and healthy. If you enjoyed this article, check out my website for more www.tristanabba.com or follow my FB page https://www.facebook.com/tristanabbapsychologist/ for a regular thread of mental wellness info and whimsical ideas related to your psychological health.


*Motivational interviewing is a conversational style of counselling that is most commonly used to help people facilitate change in their lives. It is the cornerstone of addiction therapy and something I have incorporated in to my practice supporting clients with mental health and drug and alcohol issues over the past many years. The aim of MI is not to necessarily demotivate people regarding the addictive behaviour but to instead highlight people’s motivations towards using and not using substances. By increasing people’s awareness of this contradiction, their motivation to not use can often change.

Acceptance

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Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference


The above, secularised version of the serenity prayer, will be familiar to those with a background working in drug and alcohol services or with any involvement in the world of AA/NA. For those of you who are not, it is a beautiful and encouraging example of how small words can support those struggling with control, addiction, and other mental troubles.


Acceptance is the underpinning of many Eastern and new age philosophies and has been readily adopted into the modern psychological treatment room. After all, if we can come to accept the mental struggles we are facing, our internal battles can largely be dropped in favour of peace, calm, and cognitive space. But what does it really mean in terms of the issues we are faced with in life?

What about love? What about our selves?

Many years ago a dear friend said to me, with regards to love, that I should never settle. I have battled with this concept since hearing it. Should we settle in a relationship that doesn’t quite tick all the boxes? To me, the idea of not-settling stands in opposition to the notion of acceptance in a way.

If you are single, it might be refreshing for you to consider that there can not possibly be just one-singular perfect person for you in this world. I cannot believe this possibility to be true. There are billions of options out there so logically there will always be someone. If you are in a relationship, this thought might be troubling.

From an evolutionary perspective, we are created to find someone. Anyone... Perfection is far from what evolution is looking for in our partner anyway. Perhaps compatibility may be a better description of what our genetic drive is seeking, moderated by a combination of our self-perception, our self-worth, and other underlying traits which determine how much we feel the need to be with someone else. IMHO acceptance is the realisation that it is necessary to settle to be in any relationship. The perfect person always has flaws. We may be blinded to them early on in a relationship but they will invariably emerge. Now, I’m not trying to be a negative nancy here, just a realist I hope. Acceptance of these character traits / behaviours / habits is ultimately a choice of own perceptions and the amount they weigh on our consciousness.

What of our selves? Surely this is the most significant thing that the serenity prayer guides us towards being able to affect? It is true in that we are able to change our selves through our thoughts, our behaviours, our biopsychological management. My profession is ultimately based on this concept after all. Helping people to sometimes change those things about themselves that they are not comfortable with or that is causing them mental stress.

Recently I was reading an article however, talking about counselling a client to know and accept their fundamental limits as well. I notice such a presence in the current social media world of limitlessness, absolute capability that belongs to everyone. I wonder though does this movement fail to acknowledge the basic premise that we are each, as individual human beings limited in some way or another? This is not a negative thing! Sure, your limit is someone else’s strength, but their limit may also be your strength. Acceptance of our limits is invaluable in dissipating the internal voice that harshly tries to convince us that ‘i have to be everything, to everyone, as good as everyone else, all of the time’. In letting this voice go through acceptance of our limits, peace may be found.

So, I will repeat it again. Take care people.


Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference


Choosing your career

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Okay, be prepared, the linked article is a long one but it is wonderfully written and engaging. 

Tim Urban uses simple explanations to describe the complex processes a person is faced with in choosing a career today. Such a great read. I'm not going to summarise the article here but suffice to say there are some brilliant metaphors including a yearning octopus who I love.

"The world is easy—you’re difficult. If you find yourself continually not executing your plans in life and your promises to yourself, you’ve uncovered your new #1 priority—becoming a better kindergarten teacher. Until you do, your life will be run by a bunch of primitive, short-sighted 5-year-olds, and your whole shit will suck." Tim Urban

The above quote is going up on my wall for sure!

Perhaps my favourite aspect of this whole article though is the realisation that no matter what you choose during your career path, there will always be at least one part of yourself that will not be wholly satisfied. This is okay. This is a fundamental aspect of our human nature. Accept this, and the reality of your life choices become a lot easier.

Enjoy the read

Tristan